the end

-----the end -----

sekf determination and dreams?

just a question?

what is a dream?

are there times when it should be forgotten, or an old one forgotten?

we walk alone
we stand peering at the future through the glasses we bought for ourselves
knowing full well that the rose colour was only the lens?
then we look back and wonder, if, should,could, and what if?
is that right
is it possible to view the rose colour without applying the scientific mind and reducing it to an aberation of the spectrum
is it possible to have balance within the chaotic stochasticity or ism?
never sure about these word things,
we walk alone on the path of life, we walk with others yet we are the ones who walk
we cannot look back and comment
it is us who walked the walk, talked the talk
made those choices
to return to perspective of others
it is difficult to remain objective, yet that is what i was taught?
subjectivity creeps in, feelings and emotions
i wonder along this path of hazy light an question the questions and the answers
the answers i came to, to the questions I have forgotten
the questions which have no answers
the thoughts the perceptions, do they matter
the deceit the lies, the entrapment
can we forgive, should we forgive, should we be forgiven
should we judge
can we judge if we dont understand?
can we understand without perspective?
we can only ask so many questions, till we are faced with the moment
the moment we realise that we stand before the rest of the world a construct of the life we have created for ourselves.. yes at times there are exterior stochastic events that alter our perceptions of reality, morality, justice, and in general life?
But there is little we can do about the past, all we can do is live the future (dma that deepak chopra voice in my head, it needs to be banished)
But that is the wonder of the impersonality of the garbage i spew forth..
i understand nothing, i understand a lot.. the understanding is the most hindrance
we view our lives as a moment in time, rather than an episode in the continuum of life..
what is an apology
what is a perception
where do we stand on life

to view the insanity of life, more aptly our own in contemplation we stand, sorry shiver, no worry and wonder along the flavour of life ..
how much can we change, how much must we endure
how serious are things at the end of the day?

What is important?
the ... bla bla fish paste ...

[we have to consider here what this absolutely ridiculous monologue has to offer for anyone out there?.. good question? nothing i would assume?] This is just a self indulgent diatribe about the fragmentary nature of my mind ..
maybe i should have added that to my disclaimer?

or not.. I do suppose in some ways I am rather rude in sending out these diatribes .. and yes mostly to a captive audience ..
my own gallery of .... geez be carefull of the word to insert ..
not sure ..

maybe i should detach the mailing option? but maybe not?

it is paradoxical.,,, but at best i would rather send it out to more :-)

good night .. sleep well/ wake well

it is time to pack for my holiday.. albeit brief

misconception, prescience and traffic

geez a whole lot of things, where to start he asks?

misconceptions are rife in the mind of the individual as are the outcomes of our thoughts and the interpretation of life as we perceive it..

what is bad traffic? for you for some a few cars, a lot of cars? very strange our perceptions of reality are..
as are our perceptions of time in interpersonal relationships..
as they are of people, can we understand our co-workers? or not?
strange thing that?

what are perceptions? are they real, or are they biased by objectivity or the lack thereof? the subjectivity of objectiveness, do you know what? It is wonderfull to be able to spurt non sensical crap and have people read it and read into it.. their may be a deeper level, or not?

but on a much more important thought process i was experiencing this morning or was it yesterday? not to sure..

But it has to do with prescience .. not sure if am spelling that word correctly though and the meaning is important.. i was listening to the wireless this morning or yesterday in my automobile .. and heard the most bizarre story that sprouted from the sun ( the local version thereof) .. an african woman had a vision where an angel came and spoke to her and made her pray with eugene of the green underwear and the horse .. this is not important..
but most importantly it made me wonder about this thing .. the ability to see the future . It draws me to the simple yet insane analogy that humans brains are totally underutilised and that we only use a fractional percentage of our capacity and bla bla fish paste whatever ..

but the ket to this was that it got me a wondering anf here i ramble along on a path of ludicrousness .. is it not possible that like actuaries (the pinnacle of the analytical mind (sic!)) are in fact human computers who harness the computer to proove things about patterns as stuff .. especially to do with investment and the financial market and insurance and all that crap .. as background these people take lots of facts .. crunch them and come up with very "clever" sic ! conclussions about insurance premoiums and most importantly investment (see hwo they got that one right) .. but in principal they take all this crap and from all the numbers and trends they make abjective(sic!) analysis of the data and come up with predictions ..

one wonders????
is it not possible that people who experience visions and see the future are not just simply people who have the ability to determine correlation.. note that causality is not allways important here .. I know from a very important statistician who worked for the military noted to me that he had met a number of people who played the stock market based on the success of a lue bulls game over the weekend .. does that not screw with your scientifice sense ... where we are bound to the the adage of it may be correalation but is it causal..

there may be an insane number of correlated events that have nothing to do with causality.. but yet remain correlated through some form of stochastic equilibrium.. or balance .. that in its own scentence is an oxymoron ..

but is that not the point that we have humans who are savants, not neccessarily idiots, but who see the global and universal patterns and create some form of pattern recognition or prescience which allows them to foretell the future, not withstanding the stochastic and chaotic nature of the universe..


who knows?
but the traffic .. boy it sucks .. CS jus for u:-)

quo vardis

so where two now or should i rather say.. so where to know..

after trying to read the tao of poo for the second time .. it makes more sense, yet at the same time it doesn't as does the duality or the lack of understanding of the reality we exit or perceive ourselves in ..

I stand, sit lie and wonder all the time about these things..

the brief hiatus, albeit neuro-chemically induced made a difference, as it should yet that was not the answer..

as we all stand on the brink of a new day, we wonder and we wander and wonder at the wonder..

WE are what we are.. little changes except time.. the thoughts may wane, the time changes the perspective changes, the perception the viewpoint and the understanding all changes..

we are all faced with change, for sure to be rather stereotyped and cliqued all that we can be assured off is life and taxes, or in some peoples minds death and taxes.. but i think more aptly we can only be assured of change/ stochasticity and chaos.. especially now in the age of chaotic change and flux..

does this mean there is now focus or future or does it mean something else.. no it means nothing other than this is the way things are..

sorry to disappoint you ..

we all stand at a point, a crux a fulcrum(you may wonder about that one?), there is much..

we stand and there are those of you who have a question, there are those who are questioning, there are those who stand on the brink of a new future, to be honest we all stand on the verge of a new future.. none of us know what tomorrow holds.

All we know it fills us with fear, trepidation, excitement and many other emotions.. all we can be assured of is the change and the new dawn or at least the belief of a new dawn.. things will be as they are,,,

i was thinking of more simpler things, as someone said.. there is nothing new to us .. it is all old and there is nothing new.. not like that.. in totally other words.. and then there is the emptyness the unknown..

but to know where to go? what to do to make the perfect tomorrow, maybe today is yesterdays tomorrow, should we not focus on today rather than worrying about tomorrow, yesterday and all the other days ..

i know not what the it says, the bell tolls.. time is a changing..
all we have control of is the present, we have the choice to delve in the mind, the living, the past, the future..

yes all hold a piece of the past we cannot let go off, the future is what drives us forwards or into a whirlpool of fear or uncertainty.. we cannot have absolute clarity, sometimes i think we cannot even have momentary clarity, yet at times the lucidity of the moment, the future and the past is un paralleled in its vivid nature.. know not i tell you :-)

on a more somber note i was thinking about a photographic experiment, only to find out, not without pre-conception that it would not be this way.. but that soemthing that i had thought off had been done before.. yes that i knew .. but that the clarity and perfection had been soiled into another point of reference which could well distort that which i had perceived to ahve possible value for me and purely as a statement, does that mean i cannot and will not express this vision? I know not, but it will take introspection and thought to determine the end value of such an exercise? let us see what the new dawn holds,,,